How can [editor has added: mentally] handicapped persons can be saved if many of them could not know Jesus because they are incapable of understanding the gospel and reason correctly? If the answer is that handicapped persons are surely saved, then why did God curse me so much in giving me a healthy mind since with a healthy mind I risk to going to hell? Many say God allow evil so that we can learn. Is this true? If a newborn baby dies after just a few minutes, what he can learn if he dies before the age of reason?
The God we learn about in the Bible is a just God. He holds us responsible to what we know or what we can, in principle know if we cared to learn. He does not hold us responsible to a thing that cannot possibly know. Tiny babies and people with severe mental handicaps (who are children, mentally) are saved because they are innocent. Or, alternatively, we could say that they do not need to be saved. The only ones who are accountable before God are those who are intellectually capable of sinning and of willfully rebelling against God. A severely mentally handicapped person does not need to be saved, as a small child also does not need to be saved. Jesus did not address the case of the mentally handicapped as far as we know from scripture. However, he did address the issue of small children. He said, that “their angels in heaven always see my Father in heaven. (Matthew 18:10) Children are innocent and do not need to be saved. (I am assuming here that we reject the false doctrine of Original Sin) God is just and he will make the right choice as to who to hold accountable. We can trust him to handle this responsibility well.
You find yourself wishing that you had not been given the ability to sin and to choose to rebel against God. I would say that this is not a crazy thought. To have the freedom to serve God or not serve Him is a very heavy responsibility, and it is a responsibility you did not ask for. However, it is also an awesome privilege. I understand how you could be tempted to think that being given a mind which can reason and the ability to do right and wrong is a curse. Like they say, “ignorance is bliss.” True, but ignorance is also ignorance, and, for me, having the ability to give and receive love from and to God as a free person is a truly amazing thing. Personally, I am very thankful for this amazing opportunity, but I agree with you that such a choice does some with responsibility that is very weighty. You are tempted to feel it would be better to be mentally handicapped, but surely when you are thinking rationally, you realize that this would NOT be better. The gift of rational thought is too precious for anyone to willingly give it up. In any case, you are what you are. Yes? To wish you were something you were not is not a good use of your mental energy. It would be better to deal with your actual situation, which requires that you seek for God, find him, and serve him, love him and obey him. This is a great privilege and wishful thinking that you were different from what you are is not a good use of your faculties.
It is my belief that God did not allow evil so that we could learn. He allowed evil because he loves us. Love gives a choice, and the choice must be a genuine one. All of creation serves and obeys God except for human beings (and angels?). We are the highest of his creations. God loves us so much that he gave us the ability to choose whether or not we would serve and obey him. As you well know, the great majority have chosen to thumb their noses at God and to rebel against his will for their lives. A loving God gives us this opportunity, but he also holds us accountable to that decision. This is why there is evil–not because God is testing us or training us. To be honest, I am not sure that we learn from evil. I think we learn from the consequence of evil, which is the destruction of lives. What God calls evil is things which are hurtful to us as his creation.
I hope this helps.